Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Tubby, Twig, and Wah

Who knows what deep-rooted psychological trauma we're planting in using this latest round of children's nicknames?


Twig, Tubby, and Wah at DisneyLand


There is an element of truth in each -- Tubby really does have a little Buddha belly, and Twig is quite thin. And of course, Wah will cry if you look at him crosseyed somedays, and just about everyday if you dare to say, "No." (I am so ready for that phase to end. It was old at a week, and it has been going on for at least a year now.)

I think it is helpful for us to perceive our own imperfections, and we've all got areas that could stand some improvement. DS1 knows he has been gaining weight too fast, just as DD knows she gains very slowly even while she's growing up like a weed. DS2 knows he's a cry-baby, and he knows that it's very annoying. He is learning that there are better ways to respond to the world.

There are ways to point out shortcomings that encourage positive change, and there are ways that foster resentment. So far we're not seeing anything but grins when we use these names -- it's not rocket science, after all. You don't call a kid who is upset about something a name that will tick him off. You can, however, call a kid who just inhaled his dinner, "Tubby", or a kid who is (fake) crying over nothing for the 100th time that day, "Wah."

At the right time, in the right tone, these names say, I know you. I love you. I'm glad you're mine.

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